Since moving to the South, I’ve learned so many new things that I had no exposure to growing up in the Pacific Northwest. I’ve met most with good humor- things like specifying Sweet or Unsweet, dealing with SEC football fans, the fact it doesn’t cool down at night during the summer, styrofoam cups etc. However there is one thing I’m still not used to yet…and that’s the bugs. So when my friend Casey mentioned “the cicadas are coming this year”, I said they’ve been here and casually retold the story of when I first heard a cicada and how I thought it was a chainsaw off in the distance. Then he said, “No…the special cicadas”.
Special cicadas? Instantly my brain flashed to a swarm of brain eating zombie bugs that could pick a human skeleton clean of flesh in 4.6 seconds.
Turns out I wasn’t too far off…except for the whole brain eating part. Evidently there are special swarms of these gigantic super loud bugs that sprout up when the weather gets warm enough and basically cover everything. People tell stories of the ground being covered with cicada shells that crunch under your feet on every step and needing a shopvac to clean them up. Fortunately these special cicadas only come out once every few years, which is good. Unless you happen to be holding an outdoor wedding when they show up…that might be bad.
So my other friend Jesse, who is also a transplant to the south and was part of the previous conversation, sent me a link that I want to pass along. Somebody out there really likes cicadas, and have dedicated a site to them and even has a page dedicated to cicadas and weddings. So if you are planning an outdoor wedding, you might want to check out www.cicadamania.com/wedding.html just in case. While you do that, I’m going to look into getting a beekeeping suit and a tennis racket.